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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 26, 2021 23:33:48 GMT
Elizabeth feared that her question had been too personal, that he did not want to talk about what he was looking for. There were so many things about him that she did not know and while for most, the question might have been inappropriate, Elizabeth had thought it was in tune with what they had been discussing thus far. He said he wasn't really sure and Elizabeth believed him. "Well let me rephrase the question. If you could describe someone you'd like to spend your life with, what would they be like? Or would you prefer to spend it alone? Not that there is anything with being alone," she quickly added. "Forget all the titles and responsibilities. No expectations. Would you want to get married or perhaps enjoy your tranquility alone in the woods?" Her question was not judgmental or there was no inflection to show that should he choose being alone that she would think less of him.
She laughed at his question, not because it was absurd or inappropriate, but because she had never thought of it. "I'm sure if I were a man then marriage would be the last thing on my mind," Elizabeth answered with ease. "But I suppose I would want the same type of person I described earlier. Just someone I can have a conversation with and enjoy spending time with." All she ever wanted was a companion and someone to join the family she already loved so dearly.
Elizabeth watched as he seemed to struggle with his words. She would have no problem if he needed to sit in silence, for it was not something that bothered her one bit. Elizabeth thought that when two people could sit in comfortable silence then they were meant to be wonderful friends at the very least. It seemed he did not care for being watched and just as Elizabeth was about to suggest that she turn around, he did the exact same thing. She grinned, even if he couldn't see it, but turned herself around as well so that her gaze might not settle upon his back. "Certainly," she agreed, her gaze now upon the woods with the lake off to her side. He asked about her estate and Elizabeth shrugged. "Not terribly far," she answered. "Perhaps fifteen minutes on horseback. What of yours?"
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 26, 2021 22:10:19 GMT
It was quite frustrating that there was an expectation among marriage order for daughters, and not sons. One of her older brothers was already married but not both of them. Shouldn't William be expected to marry before Elizabeth had to? "I'm afraid you are quite right," she agreed with him. The interesting thing she'd found with Jeremy was that the two seemed to agree on quite a few things that most did not think of, or that most did not dare to speak their opinion out loud. Elizabeth wasn't sure if she was being foolish by openly admitting these things but something in her gut told her that it was quite alright to do so in front of him.
She supposed he was correct once more when he said some people might think status would make them happy. Perhaps Elizabeth already had status so it was not something she worried about. She did not have to worry about marrying well to further her family's status in this world and maybe it was something she had always taken for granted. Her father had always allowed her to believe she would be able to choose a husband she wished to marry and not everyone was afford that luxury. "I suppose I never thought of that way," Elizabeth confessed, for she never had too much trouble admitting when she was wrong or being naive on a certain matter. "Well you now have me at a disadvantage. You know what I'd like to find, but what about yourself? Perhaps I can help steer you towards someone that might fit what you are looking for." After all, she did know these women differently than he did.
Elizabeth nodded and took a seat, not caring about whether or not she would ruin her light blue dress. It was often that Elizabeth would return home with grass or dirt stains on her clothes. "Are you quite alright to continue our conversation while you work or shall I let you concentrate?" Elizabeth asked, eyes focused on the movements his hands made while he readied himself to fix her cape.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 26, 2021 15:25:07 GMT
Elizabeth shrugged, not entirely sold on the idea that being able to play a musical instrument was impressive. It was one of the skills a woman was expected to learn in order to be considered accomplished, but not everyone was able to handle the skill. "I've dabbled," she confessed. "Anything I've written has been for the piano, as that's my favorite. But I've been rather fond of the violin lately as well." It seemed there wasn't a musical instrument that Elizabeth couldn't master. She found she was quite pleased when he agreed to have a conversation with her about literary works, although she supposed he could have been agreeing to such a thing out of politeness.
"Sometimes observation is the best form of gaining knowledge," Elizabeth pointed out. "My own sister has her first season coming up, so one would think the attention would be on her in the house but that has not been the case." It appeared Helen thought that getting Elizabeth married was still the more important task, not wanting her younger sister to get married before her. Truthfully, Elizabeth did not care if Emily found a match this season. She would be happy for her sister but knew that it would not look good.
She was not offended by his laugh, but rather curious as to what he found so amusing about what she'd said. Surely he had an explanation and Elizabeth did not wish to jump to conclusions. Her eyes darted down to his lips as his tongue flicked out before he started to explain. Just as she'd expected, his explanation made perfect sense and she smiled at him, a small chuckle of her own escaping her lips. "You are absolutely correct," Elizabeth agreed. "It shouldn't be this difficult. But unfortunately, it seems our society has put far more focus on accomplishments and status than deciding if two people can build a happy life together." Because in reality, Elizabeth did not care about status. She wouldn't admit it in so many words, but if she were to get married then all she truly wanted was a love match like her parents. His words, wishing her to find what she wished made Elizabeth smile and she nodded her head in thanks.
"Ah of course not. Men are not like heifers. Instead, they are sought after like a prized stallion," Elizabeth continued to joke with him. "The mamas are quite atrocious." Elizabeth might not have to deal with them like the men did, but she could still understand how terrifying they could be.
He confirmed that the stuffed animal was something he made and Elizabeth found herself quite impressed. It looked like something one would buy from a shop and if she had not known he cared for sewing, she would have guessed as much. "That's very nice of you," Elizabeth said with a smile. "And I must say, your craftsmanship on him is wonderful." Elizabeth had a small inkling that he was not often inclined to share his talent with many, so she wanted him to know that he was quite brilliant with a needle. She handed him her cape and chuckled. "Oh, please. Call me Elizabeth," she insisted.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 26, 2021 2:24:22 GMT
"Music," Elizabeth said with a smile. "Piano is my favorite but I dabble in other instruments as well." Music felt like another language to Elizabeth and it was one she was quite fluent in. It was something her mind just understood and there was nothing better than feeling music flow over her, soothing her fears or making her feel safe. She was quite pleased to hear that he was a fan of both authors she had mentioned. It was not often that she could hold a meaningful conversation with someone about books, especially ones she enjoyed, so the idea that she'd get to have this conversation with someone was more than enough to please her. "That's wonderful. I would love to hear more about your thoughts on their works sometime," she said.
His laugh just made her smile. She took no offense to his laughter but instead was relieved and further assured that he was not like most people in the ton. He would not get offended when Elizabeth spoke her truth, something she'd only been able to do in front of Benedict until just now. "There is no need," she assured him. He was correct in assuming that most women loved the attention and flourished in it. "An astute, and correct, observation." Elizabeth nodded her head with a smile on her face.
She pursed her lips together as she thought over her question. It was a good point and not one she had thought about. Had time made her more particular? "I care not for the games of courting and all that comes with it. I do not care to be impressed with titles and accomplishments. If I am to spend the rest of my life with someone, I wish to find someone I enjoy being around. I'd like someone I can have a conversation with and someone that cares to hear my thoughts." Which was difficult to surmise amongst the gentlemen that paraded themselves in front of Elizabeth each season.
Elizabeth nodded her head in understanding. She knew plenty of bachelors that were not looking for wives at the moment, far too pleased with their current lives to worry about such a thing. Her dearest friend being one of them. She was rather curious when he spoke of the circumstances and how he did not find them ideal. Elizabeth could not be certain in which way he meant it, but if she understood that he thought the balls and events were difficult, then she would have to agree. "You mean to say you do not enjoy trying to have a conversation with a possible bride with all the eyes of the ton upon you?" Elizabeth asked with a teasing smile.
To hear that he had his supplies on him was curious but not something Elizabeth would question. "Lovely," she said. Elizabeth shook her head and smiled at him. "Not a problem. It's easy enough," she assured him. Leading her horse up the small hill, Elizabeth tied his reins to a branch where he could also graze on the grass. She saw some items where she guessed he had been sitting before her small incident. She even noted a small stuffed animal and Elizabeth smiled. "Did you make that?" She asked.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 26, 2021 0:18:30 GMT
"Of course it would be an honor," Elizabeth insisted. "Art, whether it's writing, painting or perhaps music, is a form of expression and we tend to put the more vulnerable pieces of ourselves into it, do you not agree?" Elizabeth dabbled with writing music but had never gotten into writing words to go along with her music, and even that was something she did not play for people she barely knew. Benedict and her father were perhaps the two people she would openly agree to play original pieces for.
He asked what she enjoyed to read and Elizabeth grinned. She loved talking about books and whatever she could get her hands on. "I am quite fond of Jane Austen," Elizabeth gushed. "Anything that might be considered folklore where I can get lost in a world. Oh, and I've recently gotten my hands on several novels by Elias Knight and he's quite brilliant." Elizabeth could have gone on all day about novels but knew he had likely only asked to be polite.
She chuckled and shook her head. What was there to like about the social season? She'd stay in the countryside for her whole life if she could get away with it. "I'm not overly fond of all the pretending," Elizabeth confessed. "Most of the people I speak with, I hardly care to hold a conversation with them. And if I'm being quite honest with you, I don't care to be paraded around like a heifer for sale." Her statement would have gotten her a scolding if she had said it to anyone else, but she felt that he would not take offense with such a confession. "Yes, but for it to be over would mean I'd have to find someone to marry and that becomes quite a predicament when you come to realize you are meant to spend the rest of your days with this one person. I've found myself to be quite particular with the task." That, and she knew the more she held out the longer she could hold onto her normal life. "I suppose you had no luck finding yourself a wife last season?" Because surely she would have heard of him getting engaged given his rank.
Jeremy said he didn't know how to sew and while Elizabeth did not fully believe him, she did not push the topic either. She smiled, nodded, and looked back down at the cape to dust some dirt from it using her hands. Jeremy spoke and she looked back up at him, smiling at his confession. "That would be wonderful. You would not mind?" She asked, not wanting to be bothersome. "I'm afraid my fingers were never suited for sewing. They tend to be constantly moving." Sometimes they would just move as if she were playing the piano or another instrument. It drove her stepmother absolutely crazy.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 25, 2021 23:11:44 GMT
Elizabeth perked up a little when he mentioned he liked to write. She loved to read so there was no doubt that if he were to ever let him read his writings, she would enjoy it. "That's wonderful," she said with a smile. "I'm not much of a writer, but I do love to read. Perhaps one day you shall give me the honor of reading something you have written." Elizabeth did not want to pressure him or outright ask if she could read his musings, as she knew that artists tended to be self-conscious about their work and preferred to keep it close.
Jeremy began to ramble again and Elizabeth chuckled, allowing him to finish before she began to answer his questions. "It is not my first season," she explained. "Goodness, I believe this will be my third. I'm afraid I've been rather odd with circumstances and haven't been terribly consistent with my seasons." Not that she minded. Elizabeth had openly welcomed her last reprieve from the social season. "I could have one season and be tired of them," Elizabeth assured him with a smile.
Glancing down at her cape again, she sighed. It had been her mother's and perhaps that was why she had insisted on bringing it out even though the weather was perfectly fine to go without it. At his insistence that it was not beyond repair, Elizabeth quickly looked up, her eyebrows raised slightly. "Do you know something of sewing?" She asked. There was no judgement in her voice, only curiosity. Elizabeth smiled at his compliment of her cape. "Thank you, it was my mother's," she said. At least with his assurance, she was relieved to know it could be fixed and she would not be without it.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 25, 2021 2:54:53 GMT
She nodded her head in acknowledgement that he agreed to not tell anyone. Elizabeth knew she would not mention the meeting to anyone. Of course, there was always the chance that the interaction would come to have meaning and she would tell Benedict but she knew even he would show disappointment for her being so careless without a chaperone. Elizabeth found the idea of a chaperone to be quite silly but it was one of those things that society would not let her get around. Spending time with Benedict was perhaps the only unmarried man she could spend time with unchaperoned but even now her stepmother put up a fuss over it.
Elizabeth smiled and nodded her head in agreement. She could appreciate the tranquility of the countryside, especially the lake. "And what do you seek inspiration for?" Elizabeth asked. Perhaps he liked to paint like Benedict or do something else that required tranquility and focus. There was a chance he would not care to tell her in which she would respect his decision, but she found herself curious nevertheless.
"I like the quiet," she answered. "But today's outing is in thanks to my stepmother who seems quite insistent on getting new gowns for the upcoming season. One of my favorite things about staying in the country is not having to think about all of that. This might come as a surprise, but I am not overly fond of the social season," Elizabeth confessed. His mention of her cape had her look down and she nodded. "Yes, I'm afraid it is. I'm not overly talented at sewing so I'll have to have someone else fix it, if it's not past the point of being fixed," she said.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 25, 2021 1:55:41 GMT
Elizabeth was able to catch up with her horse, as he'd not gone too far. She grabbed ahold of his reins and brought him back towards Jeremy to continue her conversation with him. Her eyebrows shot up at his question on was it indeed nice to see him again. She grinned and laughed at the slip of the tongue. There had been many times Elizabeth had a difficult time keeping her thoughts to herself, wishing to say something else instead of what was socially acceptable and expected. "It is," she assured him, the grin still on her face.
Elizabeth watched, albeit with a little amusement, as Jeremy continued to fumble over his words. It appeared like he was realizing he was saying the wrong things, rather than truly not knowing what to say. Elizabeth had seen plenty of awkward people but that was not what she was getting from Jeremy. It was endearing and quite frankly, a bit refreshing. "I am not uncomfortable, but I do appreciate you checking," Elizabeth assured him. "I shall not tell if you do not." Being unchaperoned with an unmarried man would certainly cause problems if someone else were to come upon them but considering most of this land belonged to the Davenport family, likely bordering on that of the Colborne's, she was not terribly concerned with it.
"Have you come out to the lake to read or simply escape something else?" Elizabeth asked. She supposed it was rather forward but given their conversation thus far, she knew it was not overly presumptuous of her to assume he was different.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 25, 2021 1:04:12 GMT
She unlatched the cape from her neck, rubbing at her throat where it had tugged at her skin before making her fall from her horse. Elizabeth looked up to see that her horse had slowed which was good. At least she'd be able to catch up with him momentarily. A sound off to the side caught her attention and Elizabeth jumped slightly at the intruder. It was clear they held no ill-will towards her and her hand placed over her chest fell. "Oh, I'm quite alright. Thank you," Elizabeth assured him.
Elizabeth looked him over, feeling like he looked familiar. She had met this man before but it took her a moment to place his name. Jeremy Colborne, future Earl if her memory served her right. He'd seemed pleasant enough but the two hadn't been given him to really have a meaningful conversation. "Ah, yes. Unpleasant but no injuries," she said. "Lord Jeremy, it is quite nice to see you, although I had no idea your family held an estate out in the country." She just knew the Bridgerton family resided down the road from her own family's country estate. Elizabeth draped her cape over her arm as she walked forward to get her horse. "I'm sure my fall appeared quite graceful," Elizabeth said with a grin.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 24, 2021 23:37:07 GMT
Being in the countryside always put Elizabeth at ease. The ton and society tended to make her anxious and she didn't like dealing with them. If Elizabeth had her way, she would remain in the countryside so she could spend time with her family, read and play music. But that wasn't how life worked and so she could only enjoy her time when she was allowed to remain in the country. Elizabeth wasn't sure when she'd be required to return to the city but until then, she would enjoy herself.
It wasn't out of the ordinary for her to steal away from the house for a walk or a horseback ride. The weather was lovely so she decided to take her favorite horse out for a ride. There was a lake she favored and took her horse on the trail in that direction.
She began the trail around the lake, looking out across the water when something caught ahold of her cape. She tried pulling back on her horse for a moment so she could get her cape but it didn't work. Why had she even wore a cape today? Her horse lurched forward and Elizabeth yelped, being tugged back by her cape and falling off the horse. The fell also ripped her cape free from whatever branch it had been caught on, effectively putting a rip in the cape. Sighing, Elizabeth stood and dusted herself off.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 21, 2021 2:43:01 GMT
He tried to insist that she hadn't thought of what she was giving up, but truly, Elizabeth had. It was why she had spent weeks mulling it over instead of going to Benedict with it immediately. Of course, it had only appeared like a small inkling of an idea but the more Elizabeth entertained it, the more it made sense. It would by no means be an easy thing but she'd made peace with it weeks ago. The things she was giving up were things she could stand to lose.
"Of course I have things to gain from this arrangement," Elizabeth said, a frown on her face. "I get to spend my days with someone I can stand to be around and someone that I care for quite dearly. I get to continue to spend time with not only my family, but yours. If I were to marry anyone else I would have to give those things up and you know it. I will not have to go to an uncommon amount of balls and events if I do not wish to. I can spend my days minding the house but enjoying my time playing piano and reading books. Is that not the life I have always wanted?" For Benedict had known her since birth and knew the way her mind worked.
Elizabeth reached out and grabbed onto Benedict's hand, giving it a squeeze. "Yes, it would not be a love match like our parents and I would not have children," she spoke. "But we love one another, just in a different way. And we will have plenty of nieces and nephews to quell my desire for children." Elizabeth had always assumed she would have children because that's what wives did but she'd realized it made no difference to her. "You don't need to make a decision now, but I do believe you should think about it. I have, and as your dearest friend, I think you should trust me when I say I have thought of everything."
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 21, 2021 2:18:29 GMT
Elizabeth took the handkerchief from Benedict, using it to dab at her eyes but mostly just to clutch onto. Leave it to Benedict to see reason and try to get Elizabeth back into the same thoughts. She had never been the type of girl to wallow in self-pity or let little things upset her. But this had been different and it had completely knocked her off her feet. "I've not attempted to speak with him on the matter," she confessed. "He was speaking to my stepmother about it so I can guarantee that this must have been her idea." Elizabeth had always tolerated the woman but this made her opinion of her go quite sour.
"He's never broken a promise before but if he's being pushed to make such an arrangement, it would not be unimaginable for him to say that he's given me quite enough time and that now it is starting to look bad for our family name." And he wasn't wrong. The longer Elizabeth remained unmarried the harder it would be. But she'd never worried about it because the daughter of a well-respected Marquis would always be of high value, right?
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 21, 2021 2:06:35 GMT
He laughed and laughed and Elizabeth rolled her eyes. She would chalk it up to him not knowing how to handle her suggestion. Soon enough he would come around to what she was saying and realize that she had a point. "I'm not," she confirmed. Her lips pursed as she thought about how to best convince him that she had taken everything into consideration. Of course, there was always a chance that he would tell her he did not wish to accept her arrangement and if that were the case then so be it. Elizabeth would never force him into doing something he did not wish to do, but she would also make sure that he understood her reason and that this was her idea first and foremost.
"Don't you think if I held affection for another, I would tell you?" She asked, raising an eyebrow and bringing a little back of teasing into the conversation. It would have to get serious again and they both knew it. "I have been thinking about this for weeks. I have thought of every implication and what I would be giving up. But I assure you, what I would be maintaining from this is far more precious to me than the sacrifice." She looked at Benedict to try to gauge his reaction. No doubt he had not been expecting this from Elizabeth.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 21, 2021 1:49:23 GMT
The knock on the door pulled her from her thoughts. Benedict spoke her name and she realized she had completely lost track of time and the fact that they were meant to spend time together. Benedict was always a welcome face but she was not sure he was the best person to talk to this about. He could sympathize with her for what it was worth, but he would never truly understand what Elizabeth was going through. "Everything," she spoke simply.
She rubbed at her eyes and wiped away the stained tears on her cheeks. "I overheard my father agreeing to arrange a marriage between myself and another. I do not recall the name but he had someone in mind," she explained. "Benedict, he always promised I would have a choice in the matter." Her voice was strained and she looked at her dearest friend with pain in her eyes. Everything in her life that she would have to give up with a marriage ran through her thoughts. These moments would Ben would likely be one of them. There was no doubt her new husband would find her friendship with Benedict inappropriate and would not allow them to spend time together unchaperoned as they usually did. She would no longer get to frequent with the Bridgerton household as she often did and no doubt she would not get to see her own family nearly as much.
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Post by Elizabeth Davenport on Oct 21, 2021 1:39:58 GMT
His calm demeanor and lack of a real reaction was cause for concern. Had he not heard her properly? "You," she replied. "Come now Benedict, do not pretend to be daft." Elizabeth rolled her eyes and her fingers stopped playing the piano. The melody ceased within the room and Elizabeth set her gaze on Benedict. "I've been giving it quite a bit of thought and I think it could make us both quite happy," she said.
Elizabeth rose from the wooden bench and strode across the room, sitting on the chaise across from where Benedict was sitting. "I must marry soon and you know your mother will not let you remain a bachelor if she has any say in it. We both love one another, just in a different way. If we marry then you can continue to have a life with the person you love. I just . . . want you to be happy, Ben." Elizabeth waited for his reaction, knowing she had tossed quite a bit at him.
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